big blue eyes

good morning all
I have to do some cleaning now at 6:30 am because I got frustrated and sprayed bug spray on our kitchen counter - *&^@# ants! Insects make me have to do more housework and I resent that.

a movie I need to make...

... is of E's version of jumprope: one person holds a string at each end and shakes it wildly up and down in front of the second person, who watches the string intently as she jumps up and down in place grinning like a madman. Both people can enhance the experience by shouting "gum-grope! gum-grope!" (i.e. "jumprope!").

The 48 hour film festival was a very interesting and exciting experience. Our team had 12 people I think (not stopping to count), and we all had somewhat designated roles. The director of the film was our team leader and he and his wife have done this for years, so they know the ropes. I was on the writing team, and I filled in as a "Grip" (carrier, holder, and mover of things) during the shoot. Grip jobs I had included setting up lights (learned a bit about those), loading and unloading stuff, turning a fan on and off, and running to offer a sweaty man credit in the movie if he would stop his weed-eater for ten minutes. I slept from about 6 - 9 am on Saturday, then 9:30 Sat night til 3:42 am Sunday (when I drove to the next town to pick up first-draft special effects from another team member), then again from about 5:30 til 11 am. All 30-some films premiered yesterday and awards are being given out tonight. I definitely want to do this again!

Yay, Helen!

I have been wanting to write something well-thought-out and poignant about my sister running a race for me two weeks ago, but we're going to settle for spontaneous and simple tonight and avoid delaying any longer. The Race for the Cure was an amazing experience. There were throngs of well-behaved people of all ages, focusing on a common goal, wearing a lot of pink! The above picture shows how happy Helen was as she crossed the finish line. I was really glad to be there to see it. And I was bowled over by the generosity of the people who sponsored her race. I still can't believe I'm a "survivor". I look in the mirror at night, after I get comfortable in my pj's, and can't believe that's me in there with just one boob. It doesn't feel like me. It sounds and looks kind of shocking, but my emotions are the opposite. I feel so incredibly lucky and happy! I am so relieved and reassured now that I've been able to go for two or three days at a time without even thinking about cancer. I don't really want to talk about it anymore, because it feels like so long ago -- to me, it's very "over". But I want to say THANK YOU to all of you blogreaders who have supported me in many ways! Now let's move on to fighting war, corruption, and waste. We beat this one, we're stronger now, and there are bigger fish to fry. :) Love, Sarah.

speaking of numbers...

Tonight E referred to the space between her eyebrows and hairline as her "three-head".

little things

E can count to 11! I knew she was learning numbers and getting more and more of them right, but last night as we were cutting up an old magazine she counted smoothly and confidently right up to 11.

A game she has liked for the last month or so: playing "nik-nik" (picnic). She'll spread out a cloth and say "There's your nik-nik!" She has been easily frustrated when the cloth won't lie smooth in one go, so I tried to teach her to straighten out the edges instead of having to start over.

Two nights ago in the bathtub she draped a washcloth across her lower back and said she was a ladybug. But she was even more a ladybug when she added another washcloth in front. Maybe there's a ladybug costume at preschool.

She likes calling me over and over, "Mommy! Mommy!" Now she says, "My talk, you say shh" first, then she'll start with the Mommy-Mommy and escalate as I shush her. Not sure I should be encouraging this game...

ballet practice

She was inspired by ballet videos on You Tube today. She was concentrating very hard on her footwork at the beginning, and she does a pirouette at the end.

at the race for the cure

What I'm doing this weekend

Participating on a film-making team for the 48 Hour Film Festival: http://www.48hourfilm.com/ You won't hear from me all weekend but I'll report on the experience next week. The film we make (with all the others) will be screened to the public on June 28th. Important caveat: When you're writing, shooting, and producing a film in 48 hours, quality is not the main goal or outcome! But it will be fun, and the films are short, so if they're bad the torture is brief.

current activities

E likes to say "Where are we going? What are we doing?". One time she said, "Talk to me! What are we doing?" I thought that sounded like a preschool teacher's refrain. She's also picked up calling people "guys" and "you guys" - "Where are we going, you guys?".

Yesterday a teacher was leaving at the same time we were and E said "That teacher going to work." She doesn't realize that preschool is work for some people!

E notices whenever anyone is wearing something the least bit flow-y or fancy - "that person wearing a ballerina dress!" (Until recently she would always call a woman "person" and a man "man".) We watched ballet videos on you tube last night and I taught her the word pirouette.

I'm short on blogging time this week, but I do have Race for the Cure, Fathers Day and earlier pictures to post at some point. Stay tuned.

E's Fathers' Day pronouncement

"Daddies always sleep on couches."

fun in the mountains

E and I went to my parents' mountain house at the end of May, friends joined us for a few minutes splashing in the cold new river. The kids still talk about playing in the river.

watch this for inspiration

www.girleffect.org (go to website and a 2 minute video loads - it's all written but the music adds to the effect if you can watch it with sound)

And remember there are girls living in poverty in the US too, who also need investing in.

pic from the birthday party

two years ago

This is E at 7 1/2 months. She had straight, red hair!

thoughts of an insomniac

I have a routine (and a pill, if needed) that helps me get to sleep at night. What I don't have is something to help me go back to sleep after I wake up in the wee hours. But I do love the BBC radio shows that play all night. They're great company. Make me feel like a citizen of the world.

E and I went to a 2 year old's birthday party yesterday. It was fun and wore her out good. Just 3 toddlers, including the birthday boy. Parents talked a lot about sharing, as the kids are still learning this. It's totally different when it's your own toys on your own turf, much harder to share. E has gotten Victor accustomed to her taking toys from him - he just moves on to the next thing! The other boy wasn't going to put up with it though, and he and E had a few tug of wars. She had a knack for picking the very toy that he suddenly was inclined to play with - practically everything she touched became important and special. But he relaxed a little as the party went on, and his parents were good at distracting him. I was trying to remember when E started to relax on the "mine" phase, and I now remember that half the reason we didn't give her a 2 birthday party was that she was in the throes of it then. (I didn't want to deal with it!) She's still not over it, just more selective about which things she won't share. And she can't understand why others won't share with her.

I suggested her new purple sundress to wear to the party and she agreed it was a good party dress. She said, "Maybe (B, the birthday boy) will like it." That surprised me - is she trying to impress boys already?? Then she said, "B's daddy like it too, and B's mommy like it, and M'rie and Victor and Victor's daddy like it too." I also remembered some comment she made that I didn't quite catch, the other day, about "man going to say I'm beautiful". I decided she's not trying to impress people so much as she's getting used to being admired! I was afraid she was going to arrive at the party and preen, but luckily she had already forgotten and dived right into the toys.

On Friday I took her to the office briefly where people stood around exclaiming over her cuteness, and on Saturday night we went to my office's annual baseball game gathering, where there was more acclaim. So naturally she starts to expect this, at least from adults. I also realized recently, to my personal dismay, that I have already got her thinking that adornment (i.e. accessories) is what makes you "pretty". This stuff really sneaks up on us! Socialization runs deep.

things to do when you're bored

This is what we did today after E had seen two commercials for water parks as I watched the local news on a fuzzy tv, trying to find out how hot it's going to get this weekend. She wanted so badly to go in the water that she saw on tv. This was my best solution and luckily she loved it! Those are clover flowers in the water.


Below is another activity she enjoyed a few weeks ago when it wasn't nearly so hot - "driving" and detailing, wearing a hat our friend Mlana made.

We both got a nap today, and that was a treat.

Daddy's work

Here's a picture of Daddy painting for a set in a theatre.

defining Daddy

David is working out of town again. In his absence E comments on the things he does with her, like tickling and coming out to the car to get her at the end of the day. Just before he left, she saw the canoe on top of his car and remembered that she rode in it with Daddy. Yesterday we went to return a video at the video store and she said something like, "Daddy go video store with me." I could tell by her tone that she was remembering something fun or happy. Monday I tried to explain he was working and that his work was painting. She said "Daddy paint houses" -- where did she get that idea? I said no, he's painting in a theatre. "What's a theatre?" Uh..., how do you explain that if she's never (within her memory) been in one? Maybe her daddy could send a picture of him painting in a theatre so I can show her....

Mothers Day

We celebrated Mothers Day this year at my parents' house. It was the first time we had a "kids' table". E benefited from her cousins' role modeling and ate the mashed up sweet potato that she had first refused.


Grandpa puts her in the car.